The sad news is dear Gerry Bruck departed this Earth at 5:30 PM on Friday March 8th.  However, he had my mom, his dog and his two sons at his side, so he was well-supported on his journey.  Mom decided to have a cocktail party for him on Sunday, the 10th, so one was quickly organized.

It was great because at least 40 people were there, all with a special relationship to Gerry.  People said how much they enjoyed getting to know him, and when you think of moving somewhere at age 87 and being able to make so many friends, at that age, it’s quite remarkable.

The party started at 4:00 PM and people were handed glasses of wine as they arrived.  Jerralynn had made some nice h’ors d’oeuvres, and Ginette and I helped with preparing some crackers and finger foods.

The mayor was the MC and he started by telling a tale of his experience with mom and Gerry when he visited them in Nicaragua.  Then he invited others to speak, and several lovely speeches were made.  Nicky spoke beautifully about how he loved Gerry for how happy he made his gramma.  Both of Gerry’s sons gave heart-felt speeches.

By 6:00 PM most people had cleared out, and we were left with the die-hards.  After an hour of being the recipients of wine-inspired pontifications delivered at about 100 decibels, mom managed to wedge the mayor out the door.  When I counted the empty wine bottles, I saw 28 had been drunk.

However, some people had half a glass, and a few had none, so I think several people had at least a bottle to themselves in that short time.  Gerry Jr, still on Manhattan time even after a week’s visit, was completely inebriated and had to go to bed at 8:00 PM.

In other words, it was a fitting good-bye to Gerry from the Osoyoos crowd.  I think he would’ve been very happy over all of it, and knowing that made all of us feel good too.  In fact mom hopped right into the bed Gerry had died in and I slept in the same room that night, too, because his passing was as natural as birth.

One of the lovely things Gerry’s son David talked about in his speech was about the way Gerry carried on.  He loved to ski, but when he developed macular degeneration he had to stop at age 88.  He did his last run, and put away his skis for good, saying that was great for 80 years but that’s it.

He was an artist and painted, and when he couldn’t paint anymore he had to put away his brushes and paints.  Same thing, he put them away saying wow, that was great, but now it’s over.  He never brooded about things that were out of his control.

In his last years he enjoyed sitting in his chair with the dog on his lap, listening to books on tape or watching CNN.  His mind was always active, and he remained in an excellent mood until the day he died.

So trust me when I tell you this:  we all have a happy button, but some people choose not to turn it on.  He chose to turn his on every day, and I plan to continue to emulate that until my last breath.

This beautiful Buddhist chant means devotion to the mystical law, and I’ve been chanting like a lunatic all week.  Poor dear Gerry, who is to turn 98 on March 13th, is gravely ill and we’re all holding vigil at his bedside.  This makes it very hard to be in a witty mood, though he’d want that as he’s an extremely funny man.

Gerry moved in with my mom when he was 87 and she was 77.  They got their first dog the following year, and Schwartzie the poodle is now 9 years old.  The funniest part of that is how much mom has always hated pets, and now says getting the poodle was the best thing they ever did.

Gerry was born in New York, and when I try to describe Gerry to people I say, “He’s Woody Allan’s dad.”  And truly, when Woody is that age, he’ll talk and look exactly like Gerry.

For example, two days ago the nurse came into the house to visit Gerry in his bed.  She said to him, “Are you comfortable?” and he shrugged and said in his New York accent, “I make a good living.”  Bada boom.

And so we shouldn’t be sad, but it’s always hard not to go berserk when you care about someone who’s departing this Earth.  But he’s got my mom, his two sons David and Gerry Jr and Schwartzie at his bedside, so he’s in a very upbeat mood.

I’m semi-joyful with some small progress on my memoir Nuttier than a Fruitcake.  You have no idea how enjoyable it is to recount the beginnings of the fruitcake business.  The hard part is to stop obsessing over details like how to improve a sentence, and to just keep moving ever onwards to completion.  That’s when all the picky editing can begin.

Many beginning writers would kill to have this, but I have a creative writing department professor from UBC Okanagan who’s going to read my manuscript and edit it for me!  Crazy or what?  And then I’ll have to see if I can figure out an e book, and hope for the best.  And really, as long as it’s a fun exercise, that’s the main thing.

And then purely for health I left the computer and did some brisk walking around the thrift stores to break up any clots that might be forming from prolonged sitting.  An amazing find occurred at the Salvation Army thrift store as I got a pair of vintage Bill Blass pumps in mint condition for $6.00.

That sort of thing puts a person in an excellent mood of optimism.  And sure enough I found a McCalls tunic pattern for 50 cents at the Mennonite thrift store.  Uncontrollable, I went into the Bibles for Missions and bought an adorable sapphire blue handbag for $3.00.

So it’s as the Dali Lami says, it’s our duty to be happy, even during those times that try us.  And when that becomes very difficult, I sit at my shrine, light some incense and then chant nam myoho renge kyo and leave it all up to the Heavens.  A while later I’m feeling much better, typing away, dreaming of vintage Bill Blass somewhere out there.

I was just in Osoyoos for mom’s birthday lunch and the menu was exhausting but lovely.  Jerralynn, our own gourmet cook, made a whole bunch of delicious things.  We started with a goat cheese terrine which tasted as good as it looked.  It was made with dill, chives and dried fruit, and spread on home made croustinis.

Then she’d made homemade cream of tomato soup, using roasted tomatoes, and she topped the individual ramekins with pastry then baked them.  For the main course Jerralynn fried bacon, then braised Savoy cabbage in the fat.  In the meantime she’d made an herb rub which she put on salmon fillets and then they were baked in the oven.

The salmon was served on the braised cabbage which contained bits of bacon.  For dessert she’d made tres leches cake, which is made with a can of sweetened condensed milk, regular canned milk and heavy cream.  First you bake the cake, then the milks are poured on and soak in so the texture is almost pudding-like.

Luke had surprised us by coming home from Saskatchewan for the weekend, so he and Nicky were both at their gramma’s 88th birthday party.  The mayor of Osyoos and his wife were there, as well as Major General Lise Mathieu who’s retired there.  Mom doesn’t like to slum on her birthday.

And now I’m back at home and with spring around the corner the yard looks like Hell from the winter.  I need to get out there and start to clean up the pine needles and do general cutting back of all dead things.  I just don’t want to due to laziness.

I went to Fabricland and felt overwhelmed, couldn’t buy a pattern or fabric, and left feeling defeated.  However I went on-line and looked at patterns there, and may be able to persevere long enough to order one that way.  I have no idea how that’ll work as I think you print it yourself.

But then that’ll likely end up with other projects, half done, and thrown into a corner.  I may need to do something a bit more practical like paint all the ugly areas in this old house.  But then I think about starting to empty a room and taping it and feel sick.

I did manage to drop Okanagan Harvest cakes at Terwilligers in Penticton, and I took samples to the owner of Indie Lulu on Main Street of Osoyoos.  Both are gift shops where people get a lot of individual attention, so those are the best places for my product.

I was at the post office the other day and a nice clerk who’s a regular customer ordered a fruitcake.  When I arrived she said, “You don’t happen to have fruitcakes in the car do you?”  She needed one badly, so I said I’d drop one off to her.

I need about 499 other people like that, who are like mom, and have developed a yen for fruitcake no matter the season.  Then I could just stay in my lazy rut, doing very little except dropping off orders.

But soon enough, it’d be time to bake again, and then I’d be in another resistant state, not wanting to do that, either.

In this month’s newsletter my web designer added a nice graphic of a U turn sign to my column entitled, “It’s a Woman’s Prerogative to Change her Mind.”  I was explaining why there’s no longer chocolate bark on my website and how I’m returning to my original premise of making only fruitcakes.

And now, another U turn, as you’ll recall I wasn’t going to sell wholesale but instead drive people to my website.  However, I’ve decided I’m going to allow some stores to carry the Okanagan Harvest cake during the year.  This is mainly due to small Okanagan stores asking me about it, and so I thought why not?

So next week I’m going to deliver some to Sue Baldwin, the owner of Indie Lulu on Main Street, Osoyoos.  I’ve never been to her store, so I’m looking forward to it.  I’m also going to stock Terwilliger’s Gifts on Main Street, Penticton again, as that’s another logical place for my product. 

As you know, Luke left for the oil rigs a while ago.  The other day the electricity bill came and I nearly wept as it was double what it usually is.  I went downstairs to show it to Nicky, the person who must have every light and electronic device in the house on at all times.

He said, “I think it was because Luke left the space heater on in the garage.  I discovered it the other day when I went in to get the oil for your car.”  I simply don’t know if that much adrenalin coursing through a person’s veins can be good for them, but I just replied, “Well he’ll have to repay me for that.”

A day or two later as I was walking down the driveway I looked at Nicky’s bedroom window and saw the screen was torn.  Once again, I went downstairs and told him.  He replied,  “I think I might have torn that the other time I forgot my key and had to break in.”

I just stood there saying nothing, looking at him, and then he added, “I’ll buy a new one.”  I said, “Good” and walked upstairs.  I think I made myself either a Manhattan or a Cosmopolitan, but I’m not sure which.

The thrift shopping’s getting out of hand, as now I’m ending up with things I neither need nor even really want.  The other week I’d seen a nice porcelain statue of a rearing horse that I liked, made in Bavaria, but I balked a the $10 price tag.  On Saturday when I returned to the Mennonite Thrift store I noticed it was $7.

At the till I said to the cashier I really liked the horse, but as one ear’s chipped, I didn’t want to pay $7.  She said would you take it for $2.50 and I said sure.  However I was actually there for their silent art auction, as if you’ve ever been here and seen my 50 original paintings you know I need even more.

The painting I wanted was an oil by an Okanagan artist named Betty Howe.  The minimum bid was $35 so I wrote down $50 and then felt sick.  I drove away praying someone would out-bid me. The auction ended at 5:00 and they’re closed Sundays, but on Monday morning I received the call that the painting was mine.

But once I got it home and found the perfect spot for it I realized I’d felt sick for nothing, as it’s really lovely. So once again, I had to do a U turn and change my mind.

I’m excited because I get to send even more chocolate to Thailand.  You’ll recall I took 15 or 20 pounds of chocolate in my suitcase on my trip, and the people in Jan’s village were crazy over it.  Not that they got a lot, as I heard Jan’s mother ate the majority of it.  But a friend from the gym is going to Bangkok with her husband, and they’re going to meet with Jan, and Marilyn said she’s happy to take a few boxes for me.

The new long weekend in February was great, though I did nothing of any value.  Of course I visited all of my favourite stores, the Rutland Hospital Auxiliary Thrift Store, The Mennonite Thrift Store, the Salvation Army, and on Sundays at 10:00 I always go to “church”.  That would be Value Village, as the other three are closed that day.

Because it’s February I have little to do, so am bored out of my nut, and therefore I get excited over the smallest things.  I was browsing around on-line the other week and came across a company that puts family coats of arms on all manner of things.  My mom’s maiden name is Castillon, and I ordered a mouse pad with the family coat of arms on it.

Why a mouse pad for an 88-year-old?  Because mom learned how to send and receive e mails, Google items of interest and Skype in the past year.  So what could be more adorable than a personalized mouse pad?  I’ve had the same red standard dachshund mouse pad for about 18 years.

I think Luke must’ve lived prior lives in Thailand as he’s very comfortable when there.  I said that to Jan, and she said, “Wherever he was, I was with him.  We were soul mates in past lives and now we found each other again.”  Isn’t that adorable?  But there’s something wonderful about Thailand, and I find myself thinking about it often.

One fortunate thing is I’m friends on Facebook with Pon, a woman who works at the Secret Garden on Koh Samui, where we stayed.  I adore reading her posts, though last week I was alarmed to see the Rottweiler, Roti, was missing.  She said John, the Dutch owner, was sleepless with worry.

I had sent a message saying I loved having that dog accompany me as I walked along the beach.  He loved digging for live crabs in the sand and could find them hidden a couple of feet down.  But then a couple of days later she posted the dog had been found and John rewarded the Thai man who found him 5,000 Baht ($160.00).

But you know something interesting that happened as a result of the trip to Thailand and seeing people that poor?  I kind of look at the 25 pairs of pants, 30 tops and 45 pairs of shoes and think enough already!  Even if bought for five bucks at a thrift store, it’s just way too much stuff for one person to own.  And then I never wear three quarters of it, so why have it?

And now, as spring looms, I have two choices.  I can paint this room, or I can begin to write that damned memoir of Nuttier.  I pictured choosing the paint colour, taping the room, finding the paint tray, pouring the paint, getting a drop sheet and brush, and suddenly inspiration hit.  Please think positive thoughts for me, and maybe for once, I’m going to write the stupid memoir.

You may recall I had said Luke was using Kelowna as his home base for his job on the oil rigs.  He was here for three long weeks in January, then left for Manitoba with great fanfare.  One week later, he was back!  Two days ago, he left for a rig in Saskatchewan.

In between, I’m stocking up on groceries and planning menus, as it’s just like old times.  I have the two boys making their usual demands for meals, and I, the most insane human on Earth, am doing it.  Why?

I guess basically they’re just lucky, as I do love to cook and bake.  So I’m glad to have the opportunity to try new things.  Some don’t work, like the deep fried fish balls I made the other night.  A childhood friend’s mom in Osoyoos made prize-winning fish balls, but she’s dead, so I don’t know how to find Mrs. Stodola’s excellent fish ball recipe.

Today Elsa, an old friend who used to live in this neighbourhood, is coming for lunch.  I’m very excited and made spicy carrot soup for the first course.  Then I made chicken salad comprised of roasted sliced almonds, celery, green onions and chicken.  To accompany this I’m making a quick cheddar cheese bread that has to be served hot.

I also made a batch of chocolate mousse, and put it into five individual bowls.  This caused quite a stir as Nicky saw them and asked if he could eat one.  I said sure.  But then I could just feel him wanting the rest of the bowls, all the way from downstairs.  However, to his credit, all were intact this morning.  Not that Elsa and I will need the four remaining bowls, though you never know.

Like the food consumption, another thing that never changes is the eternal losing of things, and I always get called in for the search.  The other day Luke went mad because his cell phone was missing.  However it was in the most favourite area of lost things: wedged into the couch cushions downstairs.

But it’s okay.  One day I’ll look back wistfully on my three decades of parenting and miss them.  But for now, I do have to laugh at the image of any ‘dating’ on my part in this living arrangment.  Can you picture canoodling on the couch with someone, as Nicky opens the fridge door and says, “We’re out of milk.”  It just doesn’t compute, does it?

I’m kind of excited about taking a bunch of old VHS tapes of the kids and us over the years to one of those joints that turns them into DVD’s.  I cut the ad from the paper years ago, and checked to ensure they’re still in business.  They are, so I’m going to drop 10 tapes and 2 trays of old slides.

The slides are interesting.  One full tray is of my marriage to Stanley in 1980, and the second full tray is of my marriage to Denis in 1985.  I’m going to have them put onto separate DVD’s and then I said to mom, I can watch them whenever the urge to couple hits me.  It’ll help remind me that marriage and I are a poor match.

But I’m a prize-winner as a caretaker of my children, parents, family, friends and pets, so that’s a bonus for them.  And shouldn’t we all concentrate on those things at which we excel?

A nice repeat customer who has some marketing experience gave me a good tip.  She pointed out when she went to my site she had no idea whether or not fruitcake is available outside the normal fruitcake season.  So I’ve asked my web designer to place a statement to that effect right on my main page, and will henceforth incorporate it into every newsletter as well.

I always assume people know fruitcake is available year-round, but we all know how stupid it is to make assumptions.  For example, I assume because Nicky’s 23 years old, when he leaves the house he’ll turn off the TV and lights.  Wrong!

Yesterday, Sunday, all I heard coming from the basement was the constant drone of race cars going around a track.  I presume the kid’s found another video game with which to kill days of time.

For a bit of adventure, I made Kathy, David and Petra accompany me to a talk by Justin Trudeau out at the UBC Okanagan campus last week.  It was great fun, and we were smart to arrive early because we got the last four chairs.  Everyone coming after us had to sit on the floor or stand.

Though not Pierre, the kid has solid Liberal roots and appears honest and patriotic.  We all enjoyed it, and then headed to the ORA restaurant in the Best Western for dinner.  I had my usual Manhattan there, and then as Petra had had a Cosmopolitan, I decided to give that a whirl, too.

That was a mistake, as I had to race out the next day and purchase a bottle of vodka and some cranberry juice.  Now every afternoon at 4:30 I toast my gramma with a beautiful Cosmopolitan.  They’re gorgeous as they’re pink, my favourite colour!

On Saturday I thought oh what the heck, and went to the thrift stores for a bit of R and R.  A week earlier I was talking to Alison and I told her I’m not shopping as I really don’t need a single thing.  She said, “That’ll last six weeks.”  Wrong.  It lasted about seven days.

But imagine my joy at finding the hardcover Antiques Roadshow Primer for $4 at the Mennonite thrift store.  I raced home and started to look at my stuff and went through the book in a day.  I had no idea some of my furniture was that old, but according to the photos of the leg styles and pulls, it is.

You may know mom’s partner Gerry is an artist, and he had several old water colours lying around unframed, which he kindly gave me.  To save money, I decided I’d frame them myself.

Yesterday I overcame my fear of taking apart a framed print to insert my own art.  You know how on the back, there are brackets and screws in the corners?  I carefully disassembled it and removed the hideous art.  Then I took one of Gerry’s lovely water colours and put it into the frame.  Not bad.

I told mom another thing I learned from my Antiques Roadshow book is that Gerry’s style of folk art is valuable.  I can’t believe the amount of stuff I learned from a $4 purchase!

Luke left for the oil patch, so it’s back to just Nicky and me batchin’ together on Hall Road.  Luke’s an eating machine, so it’ll be kind of nice not to have to be at the store every other day.  Though as you know, I love to have a reason to cook and bake, so it’s my own fault.

Liz’ memorial was held on Saturday and I brought the baked goods for the event.  I had so much fun making all of the stuff.  I made white fudge with pistachios and dark fudge with marshmallows.  Liz’ favourite meringues, some chocolate chunk cookies and shortbread cut into cute shapes and topped with colourful sprinkles.

Afterward mom and I drove to Osoyoos together, and I spent the night.  Gerry remains an inspiration.  He’ll be 98 in March but there he was, downing a double Scotch before dinner, like always.  We had a pleasant evening, and then I drove home on Sunday.

Luke had left that morning, so I didn’t see him, but did see either his or Nicky’s handiwork when I opened the lower cupboard door in the kitchen. Someone had broken the top shelf of the lazy Susan.  That kind of thing puts me into a murderous rage.

When Nicky came upstairs I told him about my discovery, and he did the old, “I noticed that.”  Do you know at 23 and 26 years of age, nothing has changed with those kids?  I said,”well if you didn’t break it, then Luke must’ve.”  I’ll have to e mail Luke and ask him, and he’ll reply, “yeah, I noticed that.”

My goal for the next while is to study my portfolio and try to learn about stocks and investing.  This is going to be one of my greatest challenges, as I’m starting from zero.  I have adorable Joe Miller helping me and if I don’t learn, I’ll let him down, and I can’t do that.

If you’re reading this and still have mutual funds, transfer them immediately into a self-directed portfolio.  Think of the amount you pay for commission for the hands-off help you’re getting for that.  We pay more attention to celebrity gossip or sports scores than we do to the most important thing for most people, our financial well-being.

But to get to the financial well-being, I’ve had to institute a strict savings program, so I’m not shopping.  This leads to hours of spare time, as you can imagine.  It came in handy this past week as I had to gather all of my paperwork for the accountant.  I’ve also finished a couple of books.

I’m now reading the memoir Pinboy, by George Bowering, who attended the same high school my mother, brother and I did.  It gives me tremendous joy to read the names of old principals and teachers I used to know.  It sure makes me want to write memoirs of my life in the South Okanagan, too.

But of course I won’t, being the World’s Greatest Procrastinator.  Instead, I’ll decide a closet needs to be cleaned out, or I’ll have to re-arrange the art in a room.  Perhaps I’ll have the strength to actually paint a room or two.  I doubt it.

Instead, I’ll probably just daydream about spring as I walk my tiny dog around the block.

Remember how having one adult male to take care of bothered me?  Surprise!  Now I have two of them, and there’s no end in sight.  When Luke came home on December 31st he said he would be called to work any day.  I said well get down to Osoyoos ASAP to visit gramma in case you get called this week.

He raced down to spend the day with gramma and Gerry on January 1st, then got sick with a cold, so I could certainly understand not being able to go to the rigs.  But now we’ve all recovered from the cold, and I’m saying to him daily, “When are you leaving?”

We’re now two weeks into it, and I’m sorry to say my patience is wearing out.  Yesterday their pals Taylor and Chris spent the day gaming in the basement with Nicky and Luke.  At dinnertime I said to them, “I thought it was horrible having one adult male in the basement, and now I have two.”  They laughed.

But I have to say I love January and so I’m enjoying myself in spite of having Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee under my nose.  As the yard’s covered in snow and ice, I can’t do a thing in the garden, so that’s good.  There’s not a lot to be done with the fruitcake business, so that’s very relaxing, too.

Marian, my dear accountant of 21 years, invited me out for coffee lat week and told me she’s retiring. She’s found a nice person to take over her clients, so will help this new man learn all about Nuttier than a Fruitcake so that he can take over.  So I do have to get my receipts and invoices in order for them, and Marian said to do it now before busy tax season.

That’s the type of thing I hate to do, and so I procrastinate, as I’m always sure it’ll be too hard.  I’m still trying to get a handle on this time management problem, and have noticed I avoid tasks that I think will be hard.  However I also find the trick is just to start, no matter how incompetently, and it does seem to lead to the job getting done.

I read that about writing, and it’s true.  Just start writing, and then edit and read afterward.  Sitting there trying to compose the perfect sentence in order to start usually doesn’t work, so just start writing anything and that can get the ball rolling.

And of course you’ll laugh, as I list the types of meals and baked goods I’ve made for the kids.  Then I complain these fat, lazy males won’t leave.  Brownies, anyone?  But you know how I love to cook and bake, and now with one extra person here, it seems to have motivated me to be more Martha Stewart than ever.

I discovered that easy-to-make fudge, where you melt chocolate and add sweetened, condensed milk.  I tried a recipe for chow mein drop ‘cookies.’ These are odd, but Luke loved them.  I’ve made Eggs Benedict, spaghetti and meaballs, chicken chow mein, brisket, and so many other things I should have my head examined.

I offered to make the baked goods for Liz’ memorial tea next Saturday, so that’ll give me something to do, other than lure kids like the witch from Hansel and Gretel.  She had a good motive, but I don’t, hence the need for psychiatric intervention.

Last Friday I sneezed a whole bunch of times in a row, then again on Saturday, and I wondered what the heck was going on.  By Sunday morning I knew, as I woke up feeling horrible with some kind of a cold or the flu.  God only knows what it was, but it’s left me feeling like lead.

You know how I like to run around gloating that I never get sick, so it’s a lesson never to brag, isn’t it?  The last time I had a cold was in the spring of 2009 , so I guess it was time for my body to demand a break, which it did.

Luke arrived home from Thailand on the afternoon of December 31st and when he phoned from the airport I told him Nicky and I were both deathly ill.  He said he didn’t want to catch it, so would just come in and say hi, then go to Denis’ to spend the night.

Luke came in for an hour and left.  The next day he became horribly sick, too!  I said I don’t believe it’s possible to catch a germ in an hour where nothing communal was touched, but he blamed us for it.

So the week was spent with Luke, Nicky and me in the house, all sick.  There really wasn’t anything to do but get busy and eat all of the Christmas baking and chocolate, and I think we’re finally rid of it.  Monday my diet begins.

I’ve made two resolutions, one for myself, and one for the business.  For me, I want to use my time better and stop wasting it.  When I sat down and figured out how much time I have outside of the normal things we have to do it in a day, it was a lot.  I can’t figure out why I can’t get more done, other than I procrastinate horribly.

For the business, I want to sell 1,000 fruitcakes from my site per year.  That means I need to drive people to my site, but I believe this is a conversation we’ve had a time or ten in the past.  But step 1 of that is I need help with my e mail, and especially my newsletter list.  There are over 500 people on it, but the way it’s organized means I can’t find anything.

Other than that, I’m just going to wing it, having learned it’s pointless to over-plan.  At this time last year I had no idea of the changes to come, and for all of us the same thing applies for 2013.  Surprises are good.

I’m reading Buddhism for Dummies and finding it helpful.  I was explaining some of it to Luke, as Jan is a devout Buddhist so we want to learn about it.  For now, all I know is we have to try to do good things and think good thoughts, so I focus on that.

And speaking of raising one’s spirits, today I bought a bottle of Malibu (a rum and coconut liqueur), and a bottle of Canadian Club whiskey.  I have plans to slowly build a complete bar, and then each night I can order something different.  Tonight a pina colada, tomorrow a Manhattan.  Cheers!