Fantastic News on Two Fronts

Mom wanted me to move my income tax paperwork to her accountant in Osoyoos, which I did.  So far, it’s been nothing but a positive experience.  First of all, the bill was half of what I paid last year here in Kelowna.

Then I learned I’m officially poor, given my income from last year, so will get GST rebates and lowered medical premiums.  On top of this, I’ll be turning 60 so as a bonus I get 30% at Value Village on Tuesdays!

So not only am I poor but old too, which is really such good news when you think of it.  And imagine, on this paltry income I’ve just ordered $250 worth of bulls’ penises for my puppy.  We all have our priorities.

Pat, a really nice woman at the gym’s turning 80 at the end of this month, and she cycles there and back for the one hour cardio or weight training classes.  I said to her last week, “Pat, while you’re here, I have to be here, too.”  She’s a great inspiration as I age.

Last week I had two lovely lunches at the same restaurant with old pals.  The first was on Wednesday when I went to the Cactus Club and met Marie, a sign language interpreter I met over 20 years ago.

The second lunch was on Friday, and was with my old pal Ralph from university days.  He and I enjoy reminiscing about our year of teacher training.  We still speak fondly of Venn diagrams and re-tell stories we like, even though we know them so well.

Ralph asked about the fruitcake business and I told him last year was the last time I’d be selling to stores and henceforth all sales would be through my website.  When he asked why, I thought for a moment and said, “Make yer own damn fruitcakes, how about that for a reason?”

I told him I’m getting too old to be making 4000 fruitcakes to sell to stores, and after 10 years, I don’t want to.  He said his wife had recently given up her home daycare (raise yer own damn kids) and teaching yoga (learn yer own damn poses).

We agreed getting old meant setting very definite limits on what we would and wouldn’t do.  He’s like me and not motivated by money which usually confounds the hell out of people.  He pointed at his shirt and said “$3.00” as he also shops at thrift stores, and I pointed at mine and said, “$3.00 and it’s Sigrid Olsen.”

But even though my bills are low, my children like to live as though they’re millionaires, and do it in my house.  Luke currently has a Litecoin mining device running 24/7 in the basement, which generated a huge electrical bill which he tried to argue his way out of .

I held true to the peculiar oldster I’ve become, and managed to browbeat the money out of him.  And why not, as he and Nicky are currently la dee dahing it in Thailand?